Trying without a Partner (ED TTC Blog No2)

Oh the joys of being an army wife! Trying for a baby without Hubby; how does that work? I should be writing this blog from snowy North Yorkshire in our new married quarter talking about how the stress of moving and then unpacking can affect TTC, instead I'm sat on my laptop alone (Lil'Pip is in bed) in rainy wet Plymouth, while Hubby is staying in the Single Block in Topcliffe talking about TTC without a partner. Turns out our new house wont be ready until the 19th March but Hubby's job started on the 6th of this month so he's had to go without me and Lil'Pip for 6 weeks!!

So how do we try without the nookie? There will be no posting Hubby's little men, my turkey baster is for poultry only! So what can we do without spending a lot of money travelling up and down the country for just an hour of baby making, well it gives me a chance to get to know my body again properly (not in any 'self-service' sense) but it's been nearly 2 years since I've had a proper cycle.

I got pregnant in March 2010 so that was 9 months, then I've had 13 months of breastfeeding and the implant so last month, after cutting down on the number of feeds I was giving Lil'Pip and having the implant removed in December I had my first period, which when TTC is always a little bit :( but it means my body is now definitely ready to make another baby.

So now I can start learning my cycle again and noting when I'm most fertile, bring on the graphs!

So what else can we do while were apart? (Because lets remember it takes two people to get pregnant) Roughly working out (without obviously knowing my cycle properly) were going to be apart for 2 cycles so it would be great to actually use this time positively instead of just wasting 2 months trying when were already limited on time before Hubby goes to Afghan.

The most positive thing we can do now is prepare our bodies for TTC and in my case being pregnant again.

Image from http://www.sanatogenpregnancy.co.uk/

I was lucky enough a couple of weeks ago to attend the Emma's Diary bloggers event where I got to meet some of the lovely companys which support the Diary. I also got some samples to try, one of which is Santogen's 'Mother and Father to be'- Multi vitamins for couples when trying for a baby.

I'd never seen multivitamins for a man TTC before but the 'Father to be' contains key nutrients including Zinc which is important for a healthy male reproductive system and then it also includes Santogen's 'Mother to be' which contains 18 vitamins and minerals including Folic Acid, good for your health and Baby's development once you get pregnant. So even apart we each take our 1 tablet daily (when remembered- this is why I had the implant and not the minipil!l) and together are getting our bodies ready for TTC.

Another great company I talked to were the ladies from Tena who have just released a great free app for iPhone and android for your Pelvic Floor exercises. Last time I was pregnant I didn't really think about my PF until after Lil'Pip was born which meant I had a couple of 'Ooops moments' including at 8 months pregnant walking to the Midwifes (luckily only round the corner) and sneezing... DO i need to explain any more lol!

So this time I'm starting early (or should I say continuing as still do them since Lil'Pips birth) and The ‘my pff’ application is awesome, it has daily reminders and has tutorials from professional pilates instructors so no excuse not to do them right or forget. Also little tip, Pelvic Floor Muscles don't just help with those 'Ooops moments' its also great for your sex life, especially if you can learn to do them while your 'ahem' making, it keeps the fun in trying (or not trying) and believe me your partner will thank you :P

Image from http://www.lightsbytena.co.uk/

Finally, and probably the biggest task I'm attempting is to lose some weight (OMG Wish me luck) to try and get down to a healthier BMI after having Lil'Pip. Not only is a healthy BMI recommended when TTC but I'm running out of excuses now to still have my baby weight (and a bit more lol) I've used the breastfeeding excuse for 13 months now to not diet but the time is here, its time to lose some tires! It'll make conceiving easier, pregnancy healthier and I'm sure Hubby wont complain when with more body confidence I jump him :P

So wish me luck TTC without a partner, and a big shout out to any other ladies out there who have to cope with being away from their husband regularly whether TTC or not. It's not easy to be away from the person you love and it takes a lot of strength to be in a relationship when one or both of you has to be away for long periods of time. But hey, they must be worth it or we wouldn't do this to ourselves, I know Hubby definitely is :)

My introduction to blogging..

So I had been thinking about blogging for a while, my brain never stops ticking over and rambling on and on and keeping me awake with random thoughts and musings, so why not share them... maybe if I write them down they'll actually let me sleep :P

The only problem I had was where to start?... The answer came when Emma's Diary were looking for a new online TTC blogger, step in... me!!! Hurrah a place to begin my Blogging and what an amazing place to start! A focus, a ready audience and lots of support...

The issue?... I had to get the gig first- a daunting prospect for someone who had never written a blog before, but I sat down determined and within 20 minutes had my application 'blog' and off it went through the powers of the web to be 'judged' and I would have to wait a whole day to find out how my entry did.

I'll be honest I really didn't think I would get it so put the thought to the back of my mind and the day flew by quickly, on the day of reckoning I logged into my email and there I saw (1) I clicked on that little number and there was an email from Emma... Did I dare to look?...

I dared...

"We would love if you would consider joining the ED Blogging Family!"

Woohoo!!! Queue the phonecalls and texts to my family and of course Hubby sharing my excitement but then WACK! The self-doubt hit me! OMG what if this was a one off? Can I really do it again?

A week later I was at the Emma's Diary Blogger meet and greet event meeting all these 'real' bloggers, women (and man lol) with real wit and interesting lives that could keep people interested... OMG i was so nervous I didn't know if I would even be able to say my name let alone anything else.

But I was worrying for nothing, everyone I met that day was totally lovely and very supportive, and Lil'Pip was confident enough for the pair of us! He completely stole the show, just like he does everywhere he goes :)

I met fellow TTC blogger @AnotherGoldfish from Another Goldfish, New mum bloggers @ellatamsen from Bell's Little One and her gorgeous baby boy Oliver (who I could have quite easily put in my bag and taken home) and  @TheRareBitBlog from The Rare Bit and her beautiful daughter Elle, also there were pregnancy bloggers @JumblyMummy from Mellow Mummy and @liveotherwise from Making It Up and her Smallest (who did not appreciate Oliver annoying her and stealing her pencils lol) and finally flying the flag for Daddy bloggers was @kiphakes from Kiphakes.com.

Reading their blogs has been a big inspiration and given me the courage to start Love Always, Jamie-Leigh x

So anyway heres the blog that started it all... My first Blog for Emma's Diary...

Not not trying...


"Ok so how to start a blog about trying to conceive... I'll start with the introductions, I'm Jamie-Leigh, I am 23 years old and I'm a blog virgin so be gentle with me. I currently live (but not for much longer) in Plymouth, Devon with my wonderful husband, hubby- 26 and a chef in the British Army, our gorgeous 13 month old son Lil'Pip, our 12 month old white german shepherd pup Hatte and our cat Oscar.

With a big pup and a hyper 13 month old my house is always rather chaotic, even more so at the moment though as were about to relocate our family to North Yorkshire to be closer to my 5 year old stepson, Mini-Man.

Me and Lil'Pip

Sound stressful? Well were also trying to conceive...

Doesnt sound like the ideal time really does it? Well im just a sucker for punishment- the truth is I love my life, especially our gorgeous son and my step son and cant wait to give them a younger sibling but my husband is being deployed to Afghanistan in September for 3 months so we have the choice of trying now or waiting another 12 months and seeing as hubby 'roasts his stuff' in a hot kitchen all day, I'm not waiting :D

Hubby likes to think were not trying but were not 'not trying', so basically just getting on as normal but without the funny feeling hormonal implant in my arm. The thing is I dont know 1 woman who wants to get pregnant who can successfully just 'not not try', you're always thinking "Lets make a baby", "This position isnt going to help", "I wonder if we just made a baby" and waiting to find out.

Were apparently doing it this way so that were not disappointed every month if and when every girls least favourite aunt arrives, but it doesnt work! When you want to get pregnant and you know its not happening this month you get disappointed, maybe even upset if youre like me but thats the point of trying to conceive, your TRYING!

Whether is works one month or not, you try again twice as hard next month until you get your big fat positive. If it worked straight away it would just be called 'conceiving' a much less interesting abbreviation and think of all the 'trying' you would miss out on because lets face it once your pregnant you may not be in the mood anymore and finding the time with a new baby is a big task, plus you would miss the excitement of FINALLY getting that positive.

So Hubby can look at it whatever way makes him feel best but me... Well I'm enjoying the start of our newest adventure waiting for our BFP and I'm definitely going to enjoy the "trying" ;)"